When I sit down with my incredible group of friends, yes, physically sit down with them outside a virtual social connection, there is one topic that always arises; the feeling of not being where we want to be in life. At times we all feel like we are not where we want to be and that we can’t, and will never be able to keep up.

We’re all 20-something and we all have the introspective moments when we scroll through the black hole that is Instagram and Facebook and feel like we don’t measure up to the status quo. The constant connectivity of social media has us scrolling past a multitude of things daily from professional accomplishments, which come fast and furious to the declarations of eternal love on anniversaries. We top off the social cocktail with copious amounts of cute baby photos that remind us that life is creeping up on us and of course holidays we all wish we could endlessly take; it’s no wonder it’s so easy to feel inherently dissatisfied and significantly inadequate.

Do you feel like this sometimes? If you do – I hear ya girl. The thing is though, you’ve got this, because you have come so far without even realising.


Here are some reasons why you should feel like you’re killing it in your 20s. Take some time to reflect and see how many of these resonate with you.

  • You’ve tried things and you may have “failed” and you know it’s not the end of the world. Fall down, stand up, fall down, stand up.
  • You’ve learned that everything really does feel impossible… until it’s not. Then it’s liberating when you realise you can actually do what you set your mind to.
  • You’ve adapted the mindset of always doing things instead of always talking about doing things. This is a milestone in your 20s. Whether it be changing jobs, completing your degree, getting your licence – all these things count.
  • You’re wiser; you have learned from your mistakes and realise there is light at the end of the tunnel no matter what you’re going through.
  • You don’t care what people think of your hobbies, interests or life choices.
  • You’ve learned to like what you like, regardless of whether or not it’s cool.
  • You’ve found your group of like minded people and it’s balanced, and healthy. You’ve removed toxic friends and feel better for it. THIS. IS. HUGE.
  • You’re supportive of your friends instead of using them as competition.
  • You realise there is room for everyone to succeed in life. WOMEN UNITE.
  • You’re honest. You give honest answers and opinions to everyone you consider a close friend and this makes you a better friend.
  • You love spending time alone and are comfortable in saying no to something you don’t want to do, without fear of judgement or missing out. Give me my couch and a movie any day of the week.
  • You’ve done things out of your comfort zone, even though you were SO scared initially.
  • You have goals and are chasing them.
  • You have completed goals you’ve written down.
  • You also realise that things don’t happen overnight and that things take time to build.
  • You’ve taken a scary leap for things that really mattered to you.
  • Most importantly you have learned to believe in yourself and take scary leaps because you take your future seriously.

Just remember that the more time you worry about what others are doing the less you can focus building yourself up. We all have our own pace, so don’t measure your success on someone else.




Author: Ally Carey

Hi, I am Ally, a writer and creative at Substance. I have worked in the fashion industry for 6+ years as a model and now on Substance. Substance is a lifestyle blog about fashion, beauty, health and self-improvement; hoping to inspire you to live a life filled with Substance. For more: @AllyMayCarey

7 thoughts on “Reasons Why You Should Feel Like You’re Killing It In Your 20s”

  1. I commented on Instagram already but I loved this! Will be pinning for future re-reading when I have self-doubt moments (have these all the time haha). Thanks for being such a honest, thoughtful and inspirational writer.

  2. Ally! I stumbled upon your blog and just wanted to see what the site looked like, what the content was, how the aesthetics were on the page. I scrolled down the main page and decided to read this post you have. It was wonderful encouragement to hear about how young adults accomplish much more than they think they do.

    I don’t have much social media and I’ve learned to stop comparing my life to others but there are moments I struggle that I am not accomplishing my life as I would like. Thank you for the reminder that we all do our lives at our own pace. All seventeen things to feel good for resonate with me because I live these things everyday. Thank you for the feel-good.


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