My brother, Greg, stayed with us over on the weekend. As we swam in the balmy ocean late-ish Saturday evening, we found ourselves talking about the nature of spontaneity and life in general. I haven’t been swimming with my brother in – gosh – five or six years, and the beautiful day and company lead to one of those “i’m going to store this in my memory” moments. It was such a special snapshot of our now adult lives I will always remember. Don’t tell him that though.
Growing up, my brother and I were always very close – I am the youngest of four, and my brother is outnumbered in our familial battle of the sexes by me and my two sisters. When my parents fell pregnant with me, he was dreaming I’d be the little brother he had always wanted. Despite being completely and utterly female, my brother treated me as that little brother he wanted which meant trips to the beach, football and cricket. We would punch each other and walk into one anothers bedrooms as though to strike up a conversation but then fart and run out quickly. He also dropped me on my head a few times – resulting in nasty carpet burn on more than one occasion. He shared his music knowledge and we always laughed, making up characters and walking around the house talking in accents. I confided in him when I became interested in boys, and he helped move me out of home. He got me drunk – too drunk – at a pub when I was 16, so basically he was just a really reliable, responsible, trustworthy guy and now I can never drink vodka and raspberry again.
Hi mum and dad, don’t be mad.
My brother was always a really spontaneous guy, who was always surrounded by a lot of friends. Anywhere he went, people just flocked to him, like he was some sort of magnet. A metaphorical magnet. One made of meat. He is placid, a great listener and hates conflict. Growing up with this influence in my life really helped shape my own personality and helped me work out who I was in this world. Thanks to my brother, I realised from an early age manners, a kind nature and people skills get you a long way. Poorly executed accents, not so much. The world, in fact, thinks of that in fairly / highly racist terms.
There is an eight year age gap between my brother and I, and as I swam on Saturday evening with him, his wife and my husband, that gap no longer felt large, it felt like it had finally been closed and we were just amazing friends.
One of the notable points of our conversation that evening was routine, and how easy it is to get caught up in one. I had mentioned I hadn’t swam this late on a weekend or work/school night in ages and I also find it hard to put work down by 6pm. In fact, now that I think about it, work days are a little reminiscent of “Groundhog Day,” sometimes – We never break from our routines, especially when you’re running your own business. We’re constantly trying to perfect our work and it sometimes is a little same-same. I’ve decided it’s time to mix up the script a bit more and discover the secret to staying / living in the now – even if that is swimming late-ish of an afternoon / evening. But not too late, because sharks.
Saturday made me think “what am I missing by not stopping, and just working through?”. I stopped to reflect on how my refusing to take chances, to be more spontaneous, like late evening swims might be impacting things. I need to get out of my routine and make time for spontaneity – basically I need to stop missing out on the present because I’m too busy looking to the future.
A little bit of wisdom from Lao Tzu to leave you with this amazing Wednesday.
If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.
Today’s location is the very beach we swam at on Saturday night – I thought it was fitting to shoot here and show you where my realisation occurred. It also coincides with an amazing competition with Roc Eyewear, August Street, Pink Stitch, The Luxe Nomad and Eclectic Edition.
All images shot by my incredible husband, Jonathan Hayward
A big thank you to @roceyewear @auguststreet @eclecticedition @theluxenomad for 2014 and including me in ten Australian Blogger’s to take part in a cute competition! Oh how a trip to Thailand would be magical!
Also, here is my brother and I, in 1994. Man, Dorothy The Dinosaur was off the chain. Big thanks to Mum for rummaging through albums to find a beach pic of Greg and I! Go Mumma Carey!